If you're caring for an aging parent or facing the challenges of assisting a loved one or friend who is elderly? You are not alone. You are one of the 22 million Americans who care for an older adult. Caregivers provide 80 percent of in-home care, but unlike nurses and home health caregivers, they aren’t trained and often times not prepared for the challenge.
"Caregiving is a difficult job that can take a toll on relationships, jobs and emotional well-being," says Dr. Elizabeth Clark, executive director of the National Association of Social Workers. "Those who care for others need to be sure to take care of themselves, as well."
That is truly easier said than done.
How do you care for yourself when you are needed every hour of every day?
When you can’t leave the house?
Here are some tips for keeping you, the caregiver, sane:
Remind yourself - you’re not crazy
Do things happen that make you feel like you must be going crazy? I’m here to tell you, you’re not. At least I’m 99.9% sure you’re not. Things happen that we never would have imagined. Trust your gut. If you think it is unsafe for them to be driving, you’re probably right. Take a breath and think things through and you’ll realize it’s not you, it’s them. Then you can calmly evaluate what is happening. Small adjustments can make huge changes.
Ask for Help
We tend to wait until we are in crisis before asking for help or advice. Usually those of us who are capable of being a caretaker are used to doing everything. Asking for help seems that we are weak, not capable, or too embarrassed. This can be the farthest from the truth when being a caretaker.
Remember this isn’t something you asked for, this isn’t something you are trained to handle, this isn’t a one-person job. Asking for help is critical to provide the level of care you want to provide and for your wellbeing. You can’t take care of someone if you are unhealthy mentally or physically.
But who can I ask? If you don’t have a family member that can help, there are many free and paid services available. Did you know they have adult Daycare? There are non-profits who can help. Churches often have resources you never knew existed that can help. It may be something as simple as doing your laundry. Even one task can make a big difference.
Laughter is therapeutic
When was the last time you cried or your tummy hurt, because you were laughing so hard? Laughing decreases stress hormones and increases immune cells. Not sure how to get laughter in your day? Watching funny YouTube videos may be one of the easiest ways to do this.
Reminiscing about funny times is great for all of us. Even with Dementia, people can often remember times from their past and usually enjoy sharing it with you.
Being a caregiver is a hard job. It is often misunderstood by family members, friends, and other people in your life. It is important for you to take care of yourself as much as it is for caring for your loved one. I know it is easier said than done. That is why I am passionate about helping keep caregivers sane. I'm here for you!
